Made

I never thought I was made for this. Domesticity. Never thought I would be married. Never thought I would live on a picture perfect tree lined street. I always pictured myself as a city girl. No car. A spacious loft. One kid, that I loved dearly, but no father in the picture. I would work in the entertainment industry. Books or music. I would eat salads for lunch and drink my dinner. I would wear a leather coat with a scarf and sunglasses on my head. Dark hair. Curvy. Smart. Sweet. Decadent. My kid would be the same, boy or girl, it didn’t matter. I did it on my own. Independent. With family at the holidays. With girlfriends on the weekend. Restaurants and bars. Sex with strangers in bathrooms. In cars. Never at the loft. My kid was there. We fought the world together. Just the two of us… How did I end up here? In this confining place. Smothered. Dying. Slowly fading away.